Glutton day

Sometimes you do things and in the middle of them you enjoy it or maybe don't even think about it, then later you suffer and wonder what in the hell you did that for. Today was one of those days.
I've been kind of an exercise fiend lately. Although I don't really call it exercise (makes me think of circa 80's aerobics classes with leotards and leg warmers). I just think of it was, well.. I guess I don't think, I just do. I DO Yoga, treadmill, lift weights, Tae Kwon Do, elliptical, walks and belly dancing. I enjoy it so I do it. Anyway, I've done a lot lately but still find myself a little doughy and underneath that doughy exterior is a hard body waiting to come out. It's just the cookies won't let it. Girl Scout Cookies, chocolate chip cookies, peanut butter cookies, haystacks (not really cookies but who's checking?) and now Keebler chocolate graham thingies. I went to the store yesterday to get ingredients for Minestrone soup (the most delicious soup I've ever had) and then had to go and ruin it by buying treats from Elves. Of course that wouldn't be the biggest problem. Here in a nutshell is the biggest problem:
I left them in my car.
I ate them mindlessly while driving.
By 5 o'clock I'd eaten half the package.
At 6 o'clock I taught a Power Yoga class.
At 7 o'clock I did 20 minutes on the elliptical.
At 7:30p.m. I had a headache and wanted to throw up. In fact, I even said to my friend, "Do you suppose if I talk about throwing up enough that I actually will?" Seriously, it would have felt better.

That'll learn me. I got home at 8 and ate a bowl of Minestrone. Did I mention it has 10 different vegetables in it? I feel much better. And I threw out (not up) the damned treats from the Elves.

Patience

Having kids is never boring. You may have seen an e-mail circulating that says something to the effect of - "you also find out interesting things when you have sons, like..." If you haven't, let me know and I'll forward it to you. It is pretty funny. I have 2 boys, trust me, I know.
But then just when you think you've got things figured out, you get the proverbial monkey wrench. Mine is a baby girl named Eden. She's 21 months old, tall for her age and terribly coordinated. She's like my boys, X2. A month ago she finally realized that she had the ability to crawl out of her crib. Then to top it off she opened the door and let herself out.
She would be on the ceiling if her hands had suction cups. Since she doesn't she only makes it halfway up the wall.
Tonight, she went into her brothers' bathroom, shut the door and opened one of the drawers. It just so happened that the drawer was next to the door and essentially locked her into the room. And we couldn't pick the lock. So she happily ate toothpaste and chewed on her brothers' toothbrushes while sitting in the shower for the hour we tried, unsuccessfully, to get the door open. Finally, out of sheer randomness, she shut the drawer and came out. Oblivious. Thank God she didn't remember the joy of dropping things in the toilet.

So here is my own version of the e-mail. It goes something like this...

Things I've learned from my baby girl:
1. Goo gone gets pen off the television and permanent marker off the hardwood floor.
2. Too much bubble bath makes it hard to see the baby when she falls into the tub with her clothes on.

3. Babies prefer Cover Girl makeup.

4. It takes 5 washings with Dawn dish soap to get Cover Girl foundation makeup out of hair. (which, by the way, is scary – isn’t Dawn what they use to get OIL out of the fur and feathers of wild animals? How many washings does it take them?)
5. Sit 'n' Spins aren't that great unless you need to reach the counter top.

6. Long hair makes pretty knots.

If you wake up from your nap and are poopy, you can try to change yourself:

1. Take out every diaper you can find
2. Grab the box of wipes and pull out every single one.
3. Don’t forget the powder
4. Fall asleep on top of the pile of wipes on the floor.

This is a work in progress. Let's just hope it doesn't get too much longer.

Word of the Day

Recently, while looking up the official definition of procrastination I came across a new word. procrustean: [Procrustes, villain of Greek mythology who made victims fit his bed by stretching them or cutting off their legs] : marked by arbitrary often ruthless disregard of individual differences or special circumstances.
Why haven't I heard this before? I mean, this applies to so much! By my count, the following could all be considered as Procrustean.

• Large corporations (Comcast, I'm looking right at you)
  
• Corporate policies (ditto above)
  
• The current health care system
• Insurance
• George Bush
• Government in general and on all levels
• Every law in the country
  
• Schools
• The fashion industry (jeans, swimsuits especially)

I've never been one for joining in large protest groups, however, I feel it necessary to establish my stance. I hereby declare myself as Anti-procrustean! Watch here for my upcoming manifesto.

Where's my Groove?

In the movie "How Stella Got Her Groove Back" (which I have not seen, by the way), I believe they refer to her 'Groove' as her desire to meet and be with a man? So, if referring to something else (say, writing...) would it still be referred to as 'Groove'? And how does one go about getting it back? Maybe I need to see the movie. Then again, maybe someone could give me the Cliff Notes on the 'Groove' and the 'Groove' getting Back part. I'm not sure I can afford the time and effort involved in doing it myself.
I'm slowly coming out of my Existentialist Funk. Almost reminds me of the days back in college spent memorizing crap (yes, crap) for my History of Psychology course. OK, maybe it really doesn't. It reminds of Psychology and Philosophy in a general way. But not specifically of a 3 days a week, 8am class on the names of crusty old men, their ancient seeming times and their then mind-bending ideas on what was real and what was illusion. Could you imagine if any of them lived now? Here's a fun idea for your next charades game: Sigmund Freud watching The Matrix. Talk about mind-blowing.
I think a big part of my funk is the weather. I kind of hate to blame it on the weather (mainly because I know it's really my choice to be in a funk or not) but yet, look at it! Today we got 9" of snow. S N O W. All I want is, well, no more SNOW! I know it will melt soon, but really, is that necessary? I'm going to go to bed, breathe softly and visualize anything but snow.

Vacation?

As in "I need one" or "you thought I was on one". No, I have not been in some tropical locale (I wish). I have been on what you could probably call a growth vacation. I've been going through a personal growth spurt and have been compelled to read voraciously. Last week I read 3 books! Among other things. I've noticed I seem to go in cycles of:

GROWTH: read, study, discuss, intake, process, learn, Yoga
INSPIRATION: Blog, write, ideas, create, clean, sew, dance, exercise, Yoga
LAZY/REST: Sleep, TV, Sit on my butt, sleep some more, really lame TV, do nothing, eat Girl Scout Cookies, not so much Yoga

So I did a little bit of the LAZY/REST (not necessarily the same thing, but often alternates between the two) and couldn't hold my eyes open past 8:30pm. Then Daylight Savings! Sad, but I actually welcomed it. For our family it was really just time adjusting to our changed sleep schedules. (And yes, I know it was early but you'd want it early too if your kids started waking up at 5am by mid April.)
And I did a lot of GROWTH - hence all the books. I read the God Code by Gregg Braden, The Disappearance of the Universe by Gary Renard and of COURSE I'm reading A New Earth by Ekhart Tolle. I mean, who isn't? Let's see, population of the U.S. - Oprah Fans. More about that later. The book is really great at the end so keep moving through the beginning if you're just starting out. Let's just say EGO isn't just for Psychology majors anymore.
And now on to INSPIRATION! More to come...

'Tis the Season

For too much TV. I hate to admit it because 80% of the time it's not like this, but right now my kids are watching what I would deem 'too much TV'.
I don't normally watch a lot of TV. Not that I'm against TV in general or have it banned around here or anything. There are several reasons I don't watch much:
1. I have 3 kids, when do I ever get to sit down and watch what I want?
2. I have a husband who has a secret remote control magnet in his hand. Even if I were to sit and watch TV, if he comes into the room the remote gets sucked away from me into said hand.
3. The news (and many other related shows) are too depressing or sad for me. As I've learned through being a part of the program A Year of Living Compassionately (which incidentally is focusing on Media for March), watching things that make me sad only feed into many of my fears and cause me to obsess and dwell and spiral down into a black hole of ick. no thanks.
4. I live in Minnesota. We only really get good outside weather for maybe half the year. I do NOT want to spend that precious time inside watching TV.
Which leads me to know. It's February. It's freakin' cold! (-12 with a wind chill of -30 anyone?) It's bland and gloomy. I've spent waaaayy to much time alone with my kids and now they're all finding Blues Clues just a little too entertaining. It seems all activities last about 10 minutes before they get bored with them. Then it's either torment the dog time or play roller coaster with the baby's ride-on toy. Or "What can I do now MOM?"
And did I mention I have a 1 1/2 year old? Otherwise I probably would take the boys sledding or tubing or some such winter activity on the not so cold-as-hell days. It's hard enough getting her dressed at all, never mind that she refuses to wear a hat or mittens. I really don't know - is it easier to stay in or not?
So far this week we've seen the aforementioned Blue Clues, plus Wow Wow Wubzy, SpongeBob SquarePants, The Fairly Oddparents, Dinosaur King, Ni Hao Kai Lan (Chinese version of Dora?) and of course waaaayy too much Dora the Explora, I mean Explorer. There's also DVD's of Shark Week and the Godzilla collection. Frankly I'm tired of all this too. I'm really lamenting the boy's self made decision to not have computer privileges this week (as a result of a fist fight that erupted when the 10 minutes of playing with the train set was over).
Any suggestions?

Past Year, Next Year Tag

I have been tagged. My friend Laura started this tag with questions she has done with her friends and family on their birthday. While it's not my birthday, I'm always good for answering a question or two. Here goes.

In the Past year:

What was your most embarrassing moment?
Can't really think of one. I don't really get embarrassed anymore. I mean, I've given birth 3 times and have small children. At this stage in my life I think it would take a lot to get me embarrassed.

What are you proudest of achieving?
One - I completed a 2 year long advanced Yoga Teacher training (500 hours over 2 years). It was long and grueling (just kidding) - actually it was fun and inspiring. I became friends with some of the most beautiful (inside and out) women in the world! Two - that I have 3 amazing little humans in my care that are doing so wonderfully, that I celebrated my 12th wedding anniversary and my marriage is better than ever, and that life just keeps getting better the more I learn (and let go).

What would you do differently with the benefit of hindsight?
Not a thing. Not sure I could have planned it any differently. Yes, I would have liked to have had more money, less frustration and pain or completely skipped by all the family drama, but then I wouldn't be where I am right now and I like where I am just fine, thank you.

What did you love about last year?
Where to begin? My baby's 1st birthday, golf league, Manifesting classes, teaching yoga and teacher training, Belly dancing classes at the Cassandra School, Camping, parties with the neighbors, fishing camp, my garden got bigger(holy tomatoes!), the garbage truck field trip, the list goes on.

In the Next year:

What do you want to say you accomplished next year on this day?
I just finished my New Year's vision board (in lieu of a list of resolutions). On it are that I'm going to write a book, I'm going to be a part of a great new business venture, I'm going to get certified as a Personal Trainer, I'm going to go back to Florida and DisneyWorld with the family and I'm going to do even more of what I love - spend fun time with my kids, spend quality time with my hubby (Gasparilla?), yoga, dancing, writing, gardening, golf, and getting more massages.

What are you looking most forward to in the next year?
I could almost quote Laura on this one. Like my body and yoga, I'm just fascinated by every new little thing that comes up. I used to hate when employers would ask "Where do you want to be in 5 years?" I mean, WOW! 5 years is a long time, and so is 1 year, and there are so many possibilities! I've grown to love surprises (let go and be surprised!) so I am excited for each and every day to see what fun new thing might happen. Even today, my best friend called me and asked if I want to go to her house next week to see 2 friends of ours from High School that we haven't seen in 5 years. Yesterday I would have never guessed that would happen. What fun!

What goal of yours are you most tantalized by?
The book and the business venture. Oh heck, I wouldn't have it as a goal if I weren't tantalized by it!

If you knew you only had the next year to live, what would you make sure to do? What is stopping you?
Everything I'm doing. Maybe more time with the kids? I say that and yet... we all need some space to ourselves. P.S. Thank God nothing is stopping me.